[caption id="attachment_687" align="alignright" width="219" caption="President Clinton will be able to resume his normal level of hitting on chicks in under a week"]
[/caption]According to our source, the former President was having a leisurely breakfast when he suddenly dropped the newspaper, grabbed his chest, and said, “Oh my God.” When aides asked him what was wrong, he said, “I need to get to New York Presbyterian Hospital right away.” Our source stayed behind to search for evidence of possible poisoning and glanced at the newspaper Clinton had dropped.
“I didn’t think of it until later,” our source said. “But, at the top of the paper was a large headline that read ‘New York Presbyterian Candy Striper Program Rated Best in Country.’ I remembered Mr. Clinton’s reading disability that causes him to involuntarily add an extra ‘p’ to words, and figured out what happened.”
While “letteraderitis” is a rare learning disability, it seems to effect U.S. Presidents at an alarming rate. George W. Bush is perhaps best known for adding the letters “W,” “M,” and “D” to Iraq.
This isn’t the first time that Clinton’s reading problem has caused some confusion. “While he was President,” our source says, “he kept sending out memos about wanting to attend the Supper Bowl. We thought he was just poking fun at Ronald Reagan’s declining mental state during his second term.”
