Monday, February 03, 2003

Ex-Lax Spokesman Typecast As "Constipation Guy"

Liam Jefferson is a typical struggling actor, working as a waiter in Los Angeles until his big break arrives. Two months earlier, what looked to be a golden opportunity has turned into an actor's worst nightmare. Jefferson has been typecast - as the "Constipation Guy".

Liam had caught the eye of a casting agent who needed a fresh face to pitch Ex-Lax, the anti-constipation drug. Handsome and young, Jefferson was just the actor to "push our monopoly of anal relaxation products," stated agent Kevin Lockery.

At one point in the series of ads, Jefferson is depicted standing in front of a waterfall with his "wife". In the background is a waterfall. When Jefferson's "wife" tells the viewers at home about Liam's "stomach problems", digital trickery is used to make the waterfall appear to stop.

Several weeks after the ad aired for the first time, a young child stopped Liam on the street and asked him if he "had a waterfall in his ass".

That was only the beginning of the trouble for Liam, who cannot get an acting job outside of the niche of "personal hygiene product" advertisements.

Jefferson laments, "Just like Merideth Baxter Birney has been typecast as the "Lifetime movie chick", and Traci Lords has been typecast as the "chick that can take 4 dudes at once", so am I burdened with forever being the "constipation guy".